My Brain is a Steam Engine

by maximusaurus

As a child, I was always fascinated with the way things worked, and one of my earliest special interests was steam engines. The notion that just heating water into steam could somehow move hundreds of tons was just so cool.

I used to imagine that the inside of my body was like a steam engine, with water tubes, pistons, and a furnace in my stomach. As it turns out, my child self was onto something, because it’s actually quite a fitting metaphor for the way my autistic brain works.

For me, it feels as though my thoughts are the steam that powers me, and my fuel is the input I get from the world; information, sight, sounds, smells, taste, touch.

With the right amount of fuel, my brain generates the energy I need to go about life.

If I don’t get enough fuel, then I can’t generate enough steam, and getting things done is hard.

On the other hand, if I get too much, then my furnace gets too hot, the steam pressure builds, and the boiler can blow.

Daily life is a balancing act of trying to keep the engine running at a sustainable level.

Sometimes I need to let off steam to keep my boiler under control.

But like a steam engine, when it’s running just right, my brain can do amazing things.