It’s okay to not be okay
Few things can hurt as much as forcing a smile. As kids, we all learn at some point that when people ask how we are, they don’t want to know how we actually are. They want to hear “good thanks, you?”
There’s such immense pressure to always be composed, to put on a brave face, to not cause a fuss. But I know firsthand the dangers of bottling up one’s suffering. It’s physics 101; contain something under mounting pressure and sooner or later you get Mt St Helens.
So you know what? If you need to cry, cry. Sometimes it’s better to have a meltdown than to let it build up to the point of explosion. After all, let’s not forget that meltdowns aren’t just an unpleasant inconvenience; they have a purpose, they’re a coping mechanism.
Think of it this way; what’s worse, wetting your pants, or rupturing your bladder?
This lifelong social programming to suppress meltdowns can do more harm than good. Yes, there are other ways of releasing stress, such as exercise or creative expression, and it’s probably a good idea to leave the environment that’s stressing you before letting loose, but sometimes all we need is a good old fashioned vent, and you should never feel ashamed of that, any more than someone with hayfever should be ashamed of sneezing.